Belinda has been single again for six years after the passing of her husband. 

She read Bea’s comments and added:

“I’ve read what Bea was saying and here’s my take on it.

I get the feeling that I’m being helped; I’m suddenly one of the deserving poor! You know, not just being included or invited like in the past when I was a couple but now because I’m somehow needy.

I feel that my friends see me that way, and, of course, they want to help. They’re wonderful still, after six years. Well, maybe not as much. That’s not all the time, but it comes to mind. Before it was couples; now it’s like, help.

It’s not them, it’s me, and I know I have to get over it, or live with it, and not lay it on them. So, yes, its a learning thing – mine. They may change too, with time.

Though I do wonder sometimes just how they are feeling, about me, I mean, from their point of view. About themselves. Are they maybe a bit worried that this might happen to them?

I don’t remember ever giving it a thought, about being left, I mean. I thought I’d go first. There is the occasional comment, of course. Are they thinking that, like, “There but for the grace of God go I?” Don’t you think that crosses people’s minds at one time or another, and especially when there’s someone in their lives, like me, a kind of silent reminder. Or are they like me, and not think about it. At least I don’t remember thinking about it.”